(PART 2) How to not lose your mind during a PCS

Part 1 was all about getting the ball rolling. Things you can without orders, when and how to do things that require the orders and basically just all around preparation.

Part 2 is about the waiting game, and how to not freak out when things go terribly, terribly wrong.

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Everything is done.

All the appointments are made, the bags are packed, the plans are made, and now you are just waiting. Some are different than others, but the typical "last days" appointments for an overseas move are; Car, Household goods & Pet travel.

When things go wrong, your best ally is COMMUNICATION. Communicate with your spouse. Communicate with the people in charge of your car, pet, goods movement, etc.. Don't feel guilty about calling them six times a day until they come up with a solution for the thing that went wrong. Because things will. Go. Wrong.

CAR
(Insert rolling eyes and sigh here) What can go wrong right? You're just dropping your car off at a port and praying it makes it to your overseas destination. Ha ha, no. First, you have to empty it. COMPLETELY. Then vacuum it seven times, because, god forbid a speck of sand or a strand of dog hair goes to your destination. Oh, and then there's the inspection. Better not be any lights blinking on your dash. That car better be brand spanking new if you want to just drop it off on your appointment date. If not? Well, you better get to work making it look like you don't, you know, actually use it.

HOUSEHOLD GOODS
(Insert heart-attack symptoms here) I have this theory that the military chooses their moving companies strategically to test the adaptability and durability of its families. So what could go wrong? The better question is, what couldn't. They could show up and not pack half of your stuff because you have too much. They could set your X-box and expensive jewelry to the side to "pack together" in a really half-hearted attempt to hide the fact that they are stealing them. They could show up on the WRONG FREAKING DAY, making you scramble to get everything ready and throw the stuff that won't get packed into a closet that you have to tie closed to keep them out of it. You could watch, in tears, as they hulk punch your grandmas 100 year old porcelain horse to try and make it fit into a box. My advice? Pack the little things that you don't trust strangers with by yourself before they arrive.

PET TRAVEL
(Insert erratic laughter and twitching eye here) This is another one where literally everything can go wrong. You could have the wrong sized crate. You could get the date your pet flies out wrong and then have to reschedule, and then be turned away after getting up at 2 in the morning at the airport because you didn't know your dogs ear tips couldn't touch the top of his crate. You could already be at your destination and find out that the dog never got on his flight. Your pet could be turned away as baggage on your flight because its over 85 degrees at one of your layovers. The list goes on. My advice? Make sure you have backup plan on backup plan for your pet. Leave from a place where you have a friend or family member who is able and willing to take on the headache that is international pet travel for when something goes wrong and you can't be there for your pet because you're already on the other side of the world. For example, we planned it so that we would visit family and then leave for our new station from where our family lives. Thank God we did it like that, because we had the crate scenario. He missed his flight due to a miscommunication, and we had to fly out the next morning. We had no choice but to leave him behind to get to his next scheduled flight. My saintly parents took him to the airport for us at 4 in the morning only to be turned away because the very tips of his ears touched the top of his crate. SO some more pet advice - get a size bigger crate than your pet actually needs. Read everything the airline says on pets. EVERY little bit of fine print. All of it. Be prepared to have to spend money you didn't plan for. Like a new crate. Plus side - you can use that government travel card or claim it on your taxes. Yay.

Deep breaths.

You do get through it, I promise. Things work out eventually - just remember that. Sometimes it goes smoothly, but most of the time, it causes great headaches and stress-induced stomach pain. But if you stay on top of things, communicate, and keep that emergency PCS money stashed away for these trying times - YOU WILL BE FINE.

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So how about the actual flight to your new destination with kids?

TSA is suuuuuper fun, guys. Especially if you packed everything SO TIGHTLY that the scanner can't see what's inside and they decide to search it all. Fun times. FYI, jewelry has to get scanned separately from everything else. So if you packed it in your carry-on, be prepared to have to take it all out.

I've found that you really don't need much for a plane ride with kids. Don't go overboard. Here's a list of things I found necessary:

• Baby wrap/carrier (very helpful if you have to carry your baby, a diaper bag, roll a suitcase & hold your toddlers hand through an airport and during a layover.)
• Snacks (because you don't always have time to grab something in the airport, and your flights aren't always timed to where you get served meals)
• Fully loaded Diaper bag (I'm talking 10 diapers, the entire wipes container, individual formula packets if you're baby is on formula, pacifier, blanket & 2 changes of clothes)
• Entertainment (I don't condone electronics for kids, but OMG if you invest in a leap-pad, headphones and a little backpack to keep it in, YOU WON'T REGRET IT. Educational hours of silence during a plane or car ride for a 3 year old is such a life-saver. Especially when you have a baby to take care of as well. But also, a book or a tablet with movies on it for YOU during those quiet moments where both kids are either entertained or sleeping is very nice too.)

Moving is hard. Traveling with kids is hard. But it's doable. It's possible. And it can be messy (Like when your baby blows it out 30,000 feet above the ocean). It can be stressful. It can be frustrating. But it can also be very rewarding. A positive outlook is key to making it happen. The best way to not lose your mind during a PCS with kids - Convince yourself that you're having fun. Look at it as an adventure - a fantastic story you get to tell grandkids one day. You don't want this to be a memory of you yelling at your possessed toddler, who is re-enacting a scene from the exorcist on the airport floor, while dropping all of your bags because the baby decided to launch backwards out of your arms. That is not a scenario you want. So just try to stay calm, look at it like its something fun, and your kids will pick up on that in the way you act.

Kids are kind of like horses. If they sense your weakness, they will spaz.

The take-away? Everything will go wrong. Just accept it and move on. If you keep calm and look at it with a positive attitude, it WILL rub off on your kids and make things a little bit easier on you. Just remember, you will get through. Adapt and overcome.

Happy travels!